Ejaculation Problems – Delayed Orgasm

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Delayed orgasm and anorgasmia are defined as the persistent or recurrent difficulty, delay in, or absence of attaining orgasm after sufficient sexual stimulation, which causes personal distress (Fertility & Sterility 2015;104:1082–188). 25% of men routinely achieve orgasm in all sexual encounters. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th edition, the prevalence remains constant until age 50 years and then the rate steadily increases with men in their 80s complaining twice as much as men less than age 59 years (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), American Psychiatric Association 2013).

For many couples it is a source of pleasure, not a problem, because it allows prolonged love-making, but the woman may (mistakenly) assume that it means she is unattractive to her partner.

NHS UK has prepared a special fact sheet on ejaculation problems.

Also, some prostate operations and some drugs, such as SSRI-type antidepressants (selective serotonin-reuptake inhibitors), can delay ejaculation. Therefore, if you are taking medication and delayed ejaculation is a new problem, you should ask your doctor if the medication might be responsible. Alcohol can also have this effect.

How to Help a Partner with Delayed Ejaculation

The following advice is provided by NHS UK.

Sex Therapy

Sex therapy is a form of counselling that uses a combination of psychotherapy and structured changes in your sex life. This can help to increase your feeling of enjoyment during sex, and help make ejaculation easier.

Some clinical commissioning groups (CCGs) provide a sex therapy service on the NHS. Availability can vary widely depending on where you live.

You can also pay privately. Prices per session are around £50 to £80. The College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists website provides information about private sex therapists and how to find a therapist in your local area.

The relationship counselling service Relate also offers sex therapy at a number of its centres. You’ll need to pay for each session.

During sex therapy, you’ll have the opportunity to discuss any emotional or psychological issues related to your sexuality and relationship, in a non-judgemental way.

Activities may also be recommended for you to try at home while you’re having sex with your partner (you should never be asked to take part in any sexual activities during a session with the therapist).

These may include:

  • viewing erotic videos and magazines before having sex to increase the feeling of stimulation
  • erotic fantasies and “sex games” to make your lovemaking more exciting
  • using lubricating creams, or jellies, to make the physical act of sex more comfortable and relaxing
  • using sexual aids, such as vibrators, to increase pleasure

Read more information about what a sex therapist can do.

Switching Medicine

There are a number of medicines that can be used if it’s thought SSRIs are responsible for causing delayed ejaculation. These include:

  • amantadine – originally designed to treat viral infections
  • buproprion – usually prescribed to help people quit smoking
  • yohimbine – originally designed to treat erectile dysfunction

These help block some of the chemical effects of SSRIs that may contribute towards delayed ejaculation.

Alcohol and Drugs

Alcohol misuse and drug use can be separate underlying causes of delayed ejaculation, so addressing these problems may help.

Read more about getting help with alcohol misuse and drug use.

Pseudoephedrine

Pseudoephedrine tablets may be tried, but these will need to be prescribed “off-label”. This means the medicine shows promise in treating delayed ejaculation but it has not been licensed for this particular use (pseudoephedrine is normally used as a decongestant).

 

First published on: embarrassingproblems.com
Reviewed and edited by: Matt Brewer
Last updated: May 2021

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